New Adventures & New Beginnings!

It has been way too long since I have written on my blog and I thought it was time to come back and start documenting this next exciting time of my life! My husband and I are expecting a baby boy this coming April 2017 and cannot be more excited to have this little one join our family. We have already fallen in love and haven't even met him. 

I did however, have to deal with losing a community I have been a part of for many years, and that is the Weight Watchers community. As you look back in previous blog posts, I am sure you will see me reference my excitement for the program and all the amazing things I accomplished, which all is true and I will always hold near and dear to my heart. I want to share the open letter I wrote and shared. Weight Watcher corporate reached out and offered nothing more than an explanation of information I already was aware of. They never really even acknowledged what was going on and how this probably effects many women in my age group. 

So I have decided to share this with you guys as a community in hopes to bring awareness, acceptance and support for anyone who may have experienced this before. We will have each others backs and not hate or talk bad on those that turn their backs, rather rise above and trust ourselves and all the tools we have. 

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Dear Weight Watchers,

As I sit here eating breakfast on this Sunday morning, while I would usually be getting ready for my Sunday morning meeting, I reflect on the disappointment in your corporation. Recently, I reached out to my amazing leader to let her know some VERY exciting news. My husband and I are expecting our first child. I knew what was potentially in my future, yet, I kept myself hopeful that as an 8 year lifetime member, Weight Watchers would have something set in the program for me to be able to continue my journey with the support of my great community.

When I sit in my meetings and hear everything that you “say” you stand for in supporting members through ALL life stages, I find this very ironic, that during one of the most pinnacle, transforming times in a woman's life you not only turn your back but you rip everything away from a dedicated lifetime member.

Now, before you try to respond with a corporate response, I would like to state a message VERY clear. I am not interested in pointing right now. I am growing a HUMAN and know that it will take many many more points to keep me healthy and more importantly my son healthy while he grows inside of me. Trust me, I have been eating boxes of macaroni and cheese and LOTS of french fries, and I would rather not point all of that. For me, I define this moment to fall more in the BEYOND THE SCALE portion of the program you promote rather than the weight loss portion.

I have always struggled with my relationship with food and my relationship with my own body. While I understand it may be a liability risk to have a pregnant woman be a part of your program to not even figure out a way to still allow me to be a part of the community on some level has changed my ENTIRE PERSPECTIVE on what YOU say the program is.

Now to keep me from getting in trouble plagiarizing from your website, I am stating that I found the following information directly from your website, and want to point out what I have believed from the past eight years...

“Who We Are - Our proven program is not a diet. It’s about living. Your best self isn’t just about a magical number on the scale. It’s about seeing food as fuel for a healthy life finding ways to move more each day and developing the skills to unlock your inner strength so you can make healthy choices for life. Yes you will lose weight. But with Weight Watchers, you’ll also gain a whole new perspective on getting - and staying - healthy.”

“Our Roots - In the early ‘60s, Weight Watchers founder Jean Nidetch began inviting friends into her Queens, NY home once a week to talk about how best to lose weight. Today that group of friends has grown to millions of people around the world who’eve joined Weight Watchers to lose weight and lead healthier lives.”

Let me rewind eight-years on why I joined the program to begin with. My mom had found great success in her journey of changing old habits and creating new through Weight Watchers. She was reaching a point that she wanted to go back and get a refresher, and she had asked if I would be interested in joining with her. At the time, I really didn’t think that I had much to lose, so I joined. Girls night! We would attend our meetings and then go get a Weight Watcher approved dinner to follow. Loved this!

When I was a pre-teen into my teenage years, I struggled with an eating disorder and had worked very hard to get past those struggles. The one thing that I realized I still carried with me was my relationship with food. I needed some guidance, and what better place to do so than with a program that stood for empowering people more importantly empowering woman for making positive changes for themselves.

I have said this for years and shared my story on how I truly feel Weight Watchers not only CHANGED my life but it SAVED my life. I am able to be a positive role model to my 9-year old step-daughter. I am able to stand up to the bullying that exists in this world against women who feel fabulous and strong in their skin YET if you aren’t a size 0 you still have work to do.

I am not ashamed of my past or the choices I made when I was younger, because I was one of millions of women AND men that fell victim to the bullying that exists in this world of never feeling good enough. I am not ashamed to talk about a time in my life that I didn’t make the right choices but I had the courage and strength to get back up try again.

When my leader called me back this past week to let me know that I would not be able to continue the program (NOT broken up about that, again, I am growing a human I DON'T WANT TO POINT), the devastation set in. I would be losing the community that empowers me to stay strong, to feel positive in my own skin and to fight the bullies in this world that try to make me feel less than, in THAT moment, Weight Watchers, I felt you joined THEM...the bullies. I can not reiterate enough, I understand why you don’t want a pregnant woman pointing her food, but if your program IS NOT a diet, and is about living, than why? Why do you not create a community for women in ALL life stages? Whether it be pregnancy? Illness? Recovery? Health Related injuries? I am sorry but THAT is life, not the temporary moments of losing weight.

All of this frustration and disappointment is coming from a very genuine and vulnerable place. I have lived and breathed this program for eight years, and to know that during one of the most transformative times in my life where a lot could come up and I could use the community that supports me in my so-called “normal” life, you pretty much say, “Sorry, good luck, but when you are done being pregnant feel free to come back, and we will give you a courtesy of 3 months to lose the weight you put on while growing a human BUT if you don’t hit your goal weight range, we will start charging you again.”

Why would I want to come back?

Now, my feelings may change as I work through some of these raw emotions and quite honestly, I hope it does. I just can’t say that right now I believe in the program you stand for when it feels like you turn your back on members going through life. You taught me to build this program and make it a life change/a lifestyle choice, which is exactly what I did. Why aren't you going to be here for me, quite possibly, when I need you the most?

I guess I have learned a very valuable lesson in that, I had expected Weight Watchers to still be available on some level for me during this amazing time in my life, and I am now left with the disappointment that it just will not be the case.

I have all the tools to be the strong, independent, and inspiring...to be a good wife, mother, daughter, friend, without you.

I still need you, when you don’t need me. So, I guess it is time we break up. The past eight-years has been nothing short of amazing, but I truly feel I have learned everything I can from you. I am a better person because of you, but I think it is time we move on.

Thank you for all you have done for me and I am sad we have to leave on such a negative note, but I guess like they always say, “it is what it is,” and “this too shall pass.”

Yours truly,

A disappointed “life-time” member

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Thank you for always being such an amazing and supportive community. Looking forward to getting back in the grind of writing my blogs! 

To light, love & happiness! 

xoxo Ash